16 Sep 08

- So I suck at updating...I suck at staying on top of things, and sometimes just suck at getting things done...I think it's because I'm in pandora and I'm never productive in pandora...

-It may be this weekend I am moving!  exciting for sure!

-How can I afford it?  I'm not sure yet, I know more this week

-I may be getting promoted here soon, and I really want to because I need the money and I want the responsibility...I need more permanent in my life...

-I hope Future Wife is doing allright...and I miss her.  I don't like looking at girls because usually I can't get them anyway, plus most are shallow and don't understand what I'm all about

-I can't regress into myself like this...retract that last part of that last statement.

-I am JUST like Dr. House...I don't like to deal with things and put them off as long as I can, I shut down when things become too hard to deal with, I'm scared of being vulnerable.  I make jokes about every aspect of my personality because I'm afraid of being made fun of, and it keeps people at a distance.  I like people at a distance because then I have control over when they know things about me.  I lie to myself about things I shouldn't.  I am scared of commitment because I've not seen a good example of it in my family.  I like being by myself because then I have complete control over the situation.  I need to be in control of situations because I don't trust other people to be in control, My leg hurts almost every day.  I like knowing as much as I can about stuff just so i can be more intelligent than my peers.  I act with reason over emotion, and usually am able to make decisions rationally...and with age, I seem to be digressing further backwards.

-the mac is great!

-iTunes hates me I think

-Am I doing what I need to be doing to teach? I don't know

-I'm really doubting that a Masters of Arts in Teaching is the degree for me...standby on that

-I WANT TO BLOG MORE...why can't I take 5 minutes and do this?  idk

08 Sep 08

-So I need money...really quickly...

-i found out I'm not making assistant's pay right off the bat. I need to be making 25k a year at least! there's no reason I can't be making this. They have one week, or I'm finding something else.

-money equals stress equals early bedtime

-I'm moving on the 27th if I can come up with 800 dollars.

7 Sept 08

-well...last night was awesome, seeing all my old friends, and meeting some new ones...I love Bluff

-I bought my baby...24 inch iMac...I think it'll serve itself well

-I may be in debt all year because of this, however, it is worth it, because I missed being on a mac machine...I missed Leopard...

-I need to call Mike and get a copy of XP

-so I'm 3500 hundred in debt to start the year...and I'm okay with that

-but now I can open Microsoft office documents with no problem

-So who cares about money, because there's no amount of money that can buy this kind of happiness?

friday

-So I haven't updated in almost a week...so much for blogging every day

-I need to get on school work, but man is it tough to do so

-I'm in Indiana, and I can't wait for Ohio tommorow

-Driving 1024 miles in one day sucks...any way you do it, still sucks

-so this weekend will be really crazy for me, seeing all my friends and family again...but man, too many things to juggle

-If I said we should do something this weekend and we don't get the time to, I'm really sorry, but I'm back for good now (at least for a while), so I'll make time for you when I can. Because you really mean a lot to me

-Sometimes I wish Future wife would come and take me away from this...life...I feel as though I am living on borrowed space...I don't have a place of my own, I don't have my career yet, I feel like I'm just trying to kill time until I'm 25 and start teaching

-I was linked to a job offer in Pasadena...50k a year...do they know that I'm not licensed yet?

-I want to be licensed to teach..and start teaching...today

-Is Liberty right for me? Is getting a MAT going to make me marketable as a music educator? I guess I try the grad school all over again...maybe BGSU? maybe Toledo? I guess it's time to start school applications all over again...

-blogging, schoolwork, and my reviews

-The above are three things that get overlooked by me all the time...

-Future wife, can you promise me that you'll create no drama and that we'll never get divorced? thanks!

-I am going to start talking to Future wife by that name until i can replace that with another name.